MY LOVE VS MY NO PRAYER - 12/16/2023

Heavenly Father, for years I've been asking and trusting you God to heal the relationship between my adult daughter and I. It's as if though you have been silent for 14 years. Through the years I've done all that I thought I was to do. I asked you for direction, I continuously call upon your name on my knees on behalf of my daughter and I with trust that you have and still hear me and that You will look after my baby girl.

Her disrespect towards me seems to become more and more volatile the more I open my arms to her. When I do for her nothing changes. The more I do, the more she says "you have never done anything for me". Which use to bring up defense in me because I literally lived my life around my daughter all of the years of my raising her, but I'm thankful that I'm no longer defensive. Yet I continued to be what I believe Your Word called for me to be and do, which was to be there and show her love. Showing love is taught from Your Word, pulpit, leaders and many others including myself. But what does love really look like? I struggle with this question for many reasons but one is.... In the midst of being there for my adult daughter when she needs, she is still disrespectful towards me once she gets what she wants.  My truth is, there comes a point where I have to say no, even in the face of the fear of what could happen on the other side of my no. This is where making my decision to trust You God and really believe You are God is imperative. After being disrespectful towards me yet again my daughter reached out asking for help and by far one of the hardest things I had to do, not knowing the situation, was my response had to be no, with full trust in You God that You have her. I have to trust You in all things and my daughter is at the top of the many that I have to trust You fully with.

I do feel myself struggling right now to trust you God with my daughter, because this has been a vicious cycle for many years. There is not a cookie cutter solution. As much as our Christian culture loves to say "just show them love and continue to do for them. That will fix it". There is also that side that says "show them tough love and withhold and that will fix it". The truth is, no one knows what You God are genuinely saying because so often it's heard all across pulpits and social media "I think I hear God saying". It's become the normal to hear "I think" but the truth is there is no cookie cutter solution. Because if it were, we would not have the constant fight between Mother's and daughter's. We would actually have a resolution if either one of those were the answer.  I'm not saying that love isn't the way, because Your Word is clear with that. So we must show love, and it has proven that when the soul/soil is ready it can receive the love given and will thrive. But there are times when we continue to do and that in and of itself can be an enabling thing for bad behavior. Because there are times when we have to say no in love so that You can do the hard work that needs to be done in that person. A no doesn't mean I don't love my daughter, that no means I do love her, and I have to let her go through what she's going to go through even if it hurts me to see it, so that You God can get the glory and do as Your word says by changing a heart of stone to a heart of flesh.

Yes, I'm in Your Word studying. But even in Your Word there are times I'm not clear on what direction You will go in or decision You will make for a situation or circumstance. The prosperity teaching says if you believe hard enough, have more faith or give more money, it will change to our benefit. Yet, it has been proven that is not true. What is true and proven, is if I stay before You with a genuine heart, You will give me a peace in the midst of the storm and circumstances whatever that looks like. Amen.

Elenor